For Bill's 19th Birthday

January 23, 1997

Today would have been Bill's 19th birthday. In honor of that, I want to share some "stuff"...

I am seriously thinking about writing a book. Several of you have asked about that, and I know that a book could reach people that the internet doesn't. A lot of the writing has really already been done in the form of letters, journals, etc. but would have to be organized.

Also, a couple of people are talking with me about making a documentary about Bill, which may happen.

In looking at all this, I am talking with family and friends, working on getting a clear idea. This is an e-mail from yesterday, part of a "conversation" between Steve Schalchlin and me:

Steve:

As long as you don't allow anyone to turn him into some kind of Christian martyr. What is moving about Bill's Story was his innocence and "just another kid" quality.

Gabi:

I agree. He WAS just another kid. The kid who drove me crazy - now, you should have seen how his room looked - Akkkk! Not just when he was depressed either - what a mess! Hated doing his homework - there was always something better to do... When it was his turn to wash dishes - well, we could wait days (we would just let them keep piling up 'till the person whose turn it was did them - only in Bill's case, I wouldn't be able to find the counter, and would finally have to say something.) Typical stuff, and yet...

Steve:

And that's not to say he wasn't an extraordinary human being. He reminds me that we are all extraordinary human beings.

Gabi:

That is the whole point, isn't it?


I also want to share this list of music that Noel picked for his brother's memorial service. Music was SO important to Bill! Some of these were songs Bill loved, and others were ones that Noel thought needed to be included as part of his and our goodbye: \

 1. "Hold Back The Dawn" - Robbie Robertson - Storyville
 2. "Calling You" - Jevetta Steele - Bagdad Cafe
 3. "Fare Thee Well" - Indigo Girls - Swamp Ophelia
 4. "Nightswimming" - R.E.M. - Automatic for the People
 5. "Vuh" - Sky Cries Mary - This Timeless Turning
 6. "Imagine" - John Lennon - The John Lennon Collection
 7. "All Apologies (Unplugged)" - Nirvana - MTV Unplugged in New York
 8. "Healing Chant" - The Neville Brothers - Yellow Moon
 9. "Ghost" - Indigo Girls - Rites Of Passage
10. "Silent Lucidity" - Queensryche - Empire
11. "Cursum Perficio" - Enya - Watermark
12. "Be Careful Of My Heart" - Tracy Chapman - Crossroads
13. "Sweet Lullaby" - Enya - Deep Forest
14. "Love of My Life" - Queen - A Night at the Opera [Bonus Tracks]
15. "Ain't No Cure For Love" - Leonard Cohen - I'm Your Man
16. "Sounds of Silence" - Simon & Garfunkel - Sounds of Silence
17. "Pesky Angels" - The Righteous Mothers - Pesky Angels
18. "These Are Days" - 10,000 Maniacs - Our Time in Eden
19. "Let It Be Me" - Indigo Girls - Rites Of Passage
20. "Shine On You Crazy Diamond (Parts VI- IX)" - Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here
21. "Yesterday - The Beatles - Help!

And these were added by me after the memorial:

22. "Why Worry" - Dire Straits - Brothers In Arms
23. "Will It Always Be Like This? (Gabi's Song)" - Steve Schalchlin - The Bonus Round Sessions

I used Dire Straits "Why Worry" as the soundtrack in a short senior project animated film that I did in college. It was an animation of Bill.

And it wasn't written yet, but now I would add "Will It Always Be Like This? (Gabi's Song)" by Steve Schalchlin. Its on two of his albums The Bonus Round Sessions and Beyond the Light. The lyrics are on Steve's website here. Steve sang the song in public for the first time at a national PFLAG conference in Washington DC in 2000 with Alec and I sitting in the audience. The money raised from the sale of the CDs goes to support Youth Guardian Services.

Here is a graphic made from Noel's memorial audio tape cover - with some notes added by me:

1997 - 2011 by Gabi Clayton

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